ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS, NARCISSISTIC ABUSE & THE NARCISSIST VICTIM!
Recovery From Abuse! Healing From Abusive Relationships, Personality Disorders, Victims of Narcissists!
Saturday, 1:27 a.m.
From: Lisa E. Scott, the author of “Surviving A Narcissist – The Path Forward”
Memo: Narcissist, Narcissistic Relationship, Narcissistic Man
Ref: Narcissistic Abuse, Abusers, Narcissistic Men, Violence, Infidelity, Emotional & Verbal Abuse
Have you ever been heart broken over the loss of a relationship and someone you loved and found that ‘WHAT WAS LEFT OF YOU’, felt lost, depressed, lonely, full of sadness and in pain? As if your entire world had been shattered and the rug pulled out from underneath you?
If you were like me, did it feel as if you were dreaming a severely bad nightmare and all you wanted was for the pain to go away? Hoping there were some magical solution to end the misery and the heartbreak?
If so, did you find yourself asking, or wondering any of the following questions?
How can a man fall madly in-love with me, sweep me off my feet and then suddenly, without warning, ‘like overnight’ turn cold, push me away, go silent and ignore me?
Why did he go being a prince in shining armor – showering me with tons of attention, worships the ground I walk on – to being vicious, cold, mean, silent and disinterested?
Why did he change? In the beginning he was so convincing, so eager and so quickly to convince me, that the love we shared was ‘golden’, ‘cast in the stars of soul-mates’, ‘bound in the books of ever-lasting love’ and now.. He is changing….
Ignoring me and avoiding me one minute, and so normal the next..
You ask yourself, what could I have possibly done wrong? Why is he ignoring me? Why did he lose interest? Why is he avoiding me?
Was it the conversation I initiated about our future together? Or that day when I was sick and cranky? Maybe it was the phone call from my ex or his ex?
WHAT IS IT?
Obsessed with having answers, like me, did you try desperately to get him to open up?
Did it seem like the closer you tried to get to him, the further he pushed you away? The more questions you asked, he became colder, more silent, ignoring your attempts?
Perhaps you tried so hard to ignore his change in behavior, thinking he must be going through something and all the while desperately trying to avoid showing any signs of being too needy or clingy?
Then you start to wonder….
What the HELL just happened?
What is going on with HIM? Why did he push me away? Why is my relationship falling apart?
Walking on eggshells, you start digging, trying to find out what could be happening!
You HATE snooping, you despise feeling so insecure, but wondering and not knowing feels like torture!
There has to be a logical explanation for his change in behavior.
If only you knew what was happening, why he was so distant and different than before, you could fix this, right?
Is it another woman? Perhaps his ex wife? Someone new? Did I push him away? Perhaps not giving him enough space?
In the beginning I always felt special, always knew where I stood, always felt adored and now… I am confused, in pain and totally lost!
I always knew he was good looking, attractive and full of charm! I often wondered if other women thought the same thing BUT until now, I have never had any reasons to worry! No reason to suspect something was wrong!
Zero red flags, no warnings and no signs of something being wrong!
Besides, how could he just throw away an entire relationship, simply because another woman shows him interest? Even if she happens to be attractive or smart (I am too) not to mention, he has always said I was the only woman he would ever want!
So you turn to your friends……
You really need advice! You want him back, you want the relationship to be the way he use to be!
Perhaps like my friends, they said things like;
“He’s just a jerk, forget about him”.
Or they said: “He doesn’t see the mistake he’s making or what he’ll be missing” or
“play it cool, act like you don’t care and he’ll come crawling back”..
So…… you try the last bit of advice. All the men manuals tell us to play it cool, that men want a good chase, right? So you give it a shot and guess what… After weeks of pure hell, pretending to act like you don’t care, avoiding the need to contact him and looking for every torturous way to keep yourself occupied, HE CALLS!!!!
Pretending as if nothing was wrong, nothing ever happened, and back to the old sweet, loving caring man, he wants to see you!
So you begin thinking…
He did need space. He does love me, there was no break up, just a gap of time and space! He would never cheat on me, and perhaps he got scared?
He misses me! He wants this to work out! Maybe I was wrong! Perhaps I was over-reacting. I LOVE THIS MAN!
He deserves a second chance. Everybody makes mistakes! No one is perfect… Like he said, I think too much and he’s probably right!
So…. once again, he is back. Things are picture perfect!
The sex is amazing like it always was.
He makes me feel so special, wanted, needed, cherish, adored! He is so sweet, charming, caring, loving… I know where I stand, he reminds me constantly how much I mean to him and how much he wants me. How attractive I am, how sexy and desirable I am and surely no other woman could ever ever replace me! No other woman could compare..
BUT… Soon thereafter, you see a change!
It was happening again.. He’s cold and distant. He’s mean, silent, distracted and lacks interest. This time he is so abusive! He tells me he needs space, to leave him alone, go away and get gone!
So of course, like me – you’re confused, depressed like hell, heart broken and in pain!
You have a million questions and emotions running through your mind!
What the hell is going on here?
WHY IS THIS HAPPENING???
Narcissistic Men & Relationships
Narcissistic Men, they need no introduction, do they? We know them all too well. Or do we? At one time, I thought I knew how to spot a selfish narcissistic man, only to find, years later, I had no clue … literally. I thought I had finally found my knight in shining armor. I fell madly in love, certain we would spend the rest of our lives together. He appeared more caring and sensitive than any man I’ve ever met. He was heavenly and utterly hard to avoid! He was everything I had ever wanted and more and after eight years of loving someone who caused me so much pain, I finally had to wake up and make the decision to move on! Yes, after all the years of breaking up and making up, I was calling it quits!
I had to realize that he would never change and that I wanted more than he could ever give me! I was tired and I was tired of all the emotional abuse in loving this man. I was tired of being in a constant state of confusion, constantly depressed and most of all, I was tired of wondering and questioning myself. I wanted the old Lisa back!
I am Lisa E. Scott, the Author of All About Him and Besting Selling Book,
Surviving A Narcissist – The Path Forward
Nobody knows better the pain of living with, loving, and leaving a narcissist better than I. I have been there and I know, first hand, how it feels to be the guiding shadow of a damaged man. I know what you are going through and have personally witnessed the pain and hopelessness you might be experiencing.
Unfortunately, I lived it, I breathed it and yes; I survived it! You can survive it to!
Not only so, my ex-husband was a Narcissist. Not just someone who exhibited Narcissistic tendencies, but someone who was diagnosed with pathological narcissism by his own therapist. While I never understood what was happening and remained in disillusion for many years, when I finally realized that my husband would never change, that he was totally incapable of loving me and that I no longer wanted to spend my life in an abusive relationship, I knew I had to share my story with other victims.
I wrote my first book, It’s All About Him, to build awareness and help others recognize a Narcissist before getting involved and potentially getting hurt! After watching myself and countless other victims become painfully scarred by such a man, by such an emotional roller-coaster ride, I decided to write my latest book “Surviving A Narcissist – The Path Forward”.
Sure you’re friends tell you to get it over it, and yet no one knows what it is like to be in a relationship with a Narcissist unless they have been through it themselves.
I have been through it! Not with one Narcissist but two.
Surviving Abuse, Surviving An Abusive Relationship Is Something You Never Forget! It’s Excruciating and its Painful!
I tell my story to provide insight into the mind of a Narcissist. It is important we understand how a Narcissist thinks and just what motivates him. I want to help you recognize a Narcissist, the Narcissist personality before he takes advantage of you.
I also want you to understand that under no circumstance would I ever want to confuse readers by portraying that every single relationship circumstance is the same nor is every man that happens to be a jerk a Narcissist. This is simply not the case.
The PROBLEM IS THIS: Narcissists are an elusive breed that are often very hard to spot, hard to pinpoint, hard to understand and EXTREMELY hard to walk away from!
Narcissists are very deceptive!
Even Mental Health experts find it extremely difficult to measure the level and degree of narcissism one might carry.
I am not a psychotherapist nor do I proclaim to be. My writing is solely based on years of experience. The experience of my own personal pain from loving a Narcissistic man, and the journey to recovery.
My primary mission is to help you through this pain and to let you know that YOU CAN OVER COME THIS!
To Begin The Healing Process, To Begin The Path Forward & Survive The Abuse You Must Know This Has Nothing To Do With You! This Is Not Your Fault! Narcissistic Men Abuse Women!
I am often asked why we fall for a Narcissist? How is it possible for a man who is so self absorbed, so detached from love and the real meaning of commitment, make his way into our lives.
How can a woman like me go from being confident, attractive, independent, driven and in-love, only to later find that she, through this abusive relationship has cast herself in the role of being – pitiful, dependent, depressed, confused and heart broken?
How can a woman who is so cautious, so savvy to the world of dating and relationship games, and a woman toughened up when it comes to love and men, become smitten by such a pathological disorder of loving a Narcissist?
Ladies… Let me explain!
We have all had a ‘Mr. Big’ in our lives that essentially went bad. Women have also become emotionally distant and unavailable as a result of being hurt. As a result of loving someone, playing the game train and eventually getting hurt, women have conditioned themselves to remain distant from falling to hard with men, especially too quickly.
Women including myself have conditioned themselves to protect their feelings. After countless dud dates, loser men, relationship roller-coasters and years of pain, women have slowly shut the door to their hearts. In general, women have learned the hard way base upon past experiences to protect themselves! I totally agree and I was also one of those women.
BUT… NO one, including ME could ever prepare for the strike of a Narcissist.
The situation is quite horrifying and exhausting! The break up, cheating, silent treatment, heartbreak – it was a painful devastating time in my life!
I have spent over seven years documenting, writing and coaching victim’s of the Narcissist..
In fact, if there is anything YOU CAN LEARN FROM THIS BOOK, is that it’s CRITICAL to our recovery that we understand how a Narcissist operates.
To Free Yourself From A Narcissist, To Free Yourself From The Emotional (Perhaps Physical Abuse) You Must Know How These Narcissistic Men Operate!
So Why Me… How Could This Happen To Me?
GOD only knows, relationships can feel like a whirlwind of games! Trying to imagine a relationship without ‘games’ is like trying to imagine a world without sunlight, it simply can’t happen. It’s where both individuals put forth their best! It’s the normal process where we drape our credentials and show off all our best skills.
Like “niceness,” and “understanding,” and “sexy,” and “smart,” and “funny,” and so on. Men use other tactics like charm. Ladies, this is normal!
With the Narcissist, it’s quite different than the ordinary game of attraction. The lure of a Narcissist, GOES WAY BEYOND charm!
Narcissists are Pathological Charmers and known to thrive on Games! In fact, many victims of the Narcissists later describe it as a roller-coaster ride on steroids! Initial highs followed by many sudden lows. This is why most victims often have a very hard time getting over the break up and the loss of the Narcissist!
Deadly Mistakes Women Fail To Realize When Dealing With Abusive Men!
Mistake #1 – Women Fail To Realize This Is Not Their Fault!
Being in love with a Narcissist is a confusing state of affairs, to say the least. In the beginning, a Narcissist makes you feel incredibly loved and valued. He appears to be head-over-heels in love with you and worships the ground you walk on. He writes you poetry, takes you out for romantic dinners, and finds all your little quirks endearing and adorable.
Narcissists know exactly what you want to hear and exactly who you want them to be. Narcissists are gifted manipulators who can sweep anyone off their feet. They are charming and irresistible. Above all, they make you feel as though they understand you like no man has or ever will. This is all common with Narcissistic behavior!
I KNOW THIS PERSONALLY!
From the perfect beginning to the ugly and painful end, it’s as if Narcissists read the same manual! In the beginning they build the unsuspecting loved one’s self-esteem up to a point they had never experienced before, and then slowly, painfully and viciously the Narcissist tears them DOWN AND RIPS THEM APART!
So you ask… How Do We Fall For This Trap?
The Narcissistic Man – Beauty Behind The Beast
Meet Prince Charming – Out of nowhere, he appears – rocking your world like a category 10! He is so good that he doesn’t have to say anything. He is so well built; he can read your mind, body and spirit. He flourishes you with gifts, attention, time and energy. He romances you. He calls constantly and sends hourly reminders of his existence. He is the complete package. Never before have you encountered such a whirlwind of events that made you consciously know he’s the one. He is overtly caring, charming, sexy, smart, intuitive, refreshing and literally addicting.
He showers you with attention, praise, compliments and through his constant reminders lets you know he is completely interested in you.
As time passes, you fall madly and crazily in love with ‘Him’! You feel sick, you can’t eat, you don’t know what you are thinking and feeling, but you are ‘thinking excessively’. You feel happy, you feel sad and unsettled, you worry, your ecstatic. It’s the intoxicating moment you’ve so patiently waited for. The moment when you finally feel desired, attractive, special, adored and loved! Without effort, someone understands you, accepts you, admires and idolizes you.
AND THEN SOMETHING BEGINS TO CHANGE
Mr. Wonderful and Mr. Price Charming is not the same man!
Hence – Your Man Changed!
Perhaps it was a slow gradual process or an immediate change, but something changed! This man is not the same man. Who is he?
All relationships with an incredibly romantic beginning eventually calm down. One day your Prince with all his charm doesn’t look quite the same. And in fact, he doesn’t look at you as the ‘Center Fold’ you once were, (a figment of his imagination). This is normal!
During the normal honeymoon stage in relationships, both you and your partner can only see the dynamics of something fresh, something new. The excitement and newness of the relationship, the cycles of highs and lows are all normal!
The actress and the actor are now forced with seeing each other outside of the obvious roles they’ve been playing, and the crossing point where one must face reality.
But the horrifying fact is, when dealing with a Narcissist, no one can ever expect the cycle you will eventually face. It’s quite different! The ‘Game Face’, which is an essential tactic in any competitive event, and often used by a Narcissist is now starting to dissipate. His ‘Mask’ slowly begins to come off. His disorder beaming through.
During the luring stage of the relationship, the Narcissist totally idealizes his victim. (Narcissistic Idealization)
He indicates he sees her as wonderful, perfect, his soul mate. He notes her amazing abilities, her brilliance, sweetness, and any other personality trait he can hone in on. He did this in order to speed up the sensation of attachment and move the relationship forward quickly.
Narcissists feed off of the attention they get from people. Adoration from others is what fuels them. It is like a drug to them and they are addicted to it. NS is any form of attention an individual receives from others.
The emotional abuse that occurs in a relationship with a Narcissist is merciless and relentless. Narcissist’s brainwash us. They use several different methods of coercion in order to obtain control over us. They love us madly in the beginning, sweep us off our feet and falter in the end!
Once the Narcissist realizes he has YOU, That YOU Love HIM, YOU Are HOOKED – The Nightmare and Roller Coaster begins!
THE NARCISSIST MASKS BEGINS TO FALL OFF…
Devaluation (Narcissistic Devaluation) Sets In!
Throughout my e-Book, I will answer many common questions victims typically ask. To understand the Narcissist’s Crazy Making is to start the process of healing!
Mistake #2 – Women Fail To Realize That The Narcissist Uses Forms of Punishment To Control His Victim’s!
Narcissistic Devaluation, Silent Treatment, Ignoring, Devaluation, Narcissistic Behavior
During this stage, the underside of his Narcissistic Personality seeps through. His temperament changes and so does yours. He quits calling and you call more. His messages are shorter and yours get longer. The once confident now becomes clingy, needy, and insecure. The once adored and idolized now gets ignored, confused, and resorts to a state of confusion. He uses avoiding tactics, ignoring and silent treatment as a form of punishment!
It is inevitable – criticisms, recriminations and humiliations are foisted upon the partner. The narcissist conjures up the tiniest mistake or oversight to use as an opening for a major battle. He or she throws out empty accusations with vehemence as if they were the worst crime ever perpetrated.
Or reverse psychology is performed and the Narcissist which initially portrayed to be the ideal partner, the prince in shining armor now uses taglines like ‘ I am no good for you or we are not good together’! It is an experience the victim never understands. Probably never will.
The reality is, when a Narcissist is chasing after you, he uses every lure in his box. The Narcissist has learned from previous performances exactly what it takes to lure in his next catch, and will go to extreme measures in getting what he wants. And he so often does!
The Narcissistic Man – Cycles & Patterns
Phase 1 – Narcissistic Idealization
- In the beginning, did he seem God sent? The man that could see and feel your soul?
- Was he very eager, persistent, determined and convinced that you were the one? ‘As if the Soul-mate Theory had finally made its way and connected the two of you’?
- Was he strikingly different in every single aspect? As in over-the-top – the Omega Male? Or perhaps he ‘initially’ came across as nothing more than ‘average’ and yet through his conquest to have you, you became smitten by him? He was different than any man you had ever met?
- Did he know all the right things to say, the words you have been craving and starving for?
- Is the sex absolutely amazing? As in ‘Fireworks’! Did he bring out a side of you, you never knew existed? At least not on this level?
- Do you find that your life took on a brand new meaning? Hence – you now have purpose; you now finally know what it feels like to be truly on top if the world? Ecstasy?
- You have had other relationships and none of them compare?
- You spend countless amounts of time together and it never seems to be enough?
Phase 2 – Narcissistic Devaluation
- Slowly and gradually as time went on, did you notice something different about him? As in the way he treated you, the way he made you feel? Perhaps becoming less interested?
- Did he go from being caring; tentative and showering you with tons of attention and now shows signs of being cold and distant?
- Does he keep you in a state of confusion, never knowing where you stand, what he’s thinking or how he feels? Is he Hot & Cold?
- Does he go for weeks without showing any sign of interest only to later come crawling back as if he was the same loving man you initially met? (Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde)
- Have you found reasons to believe he is lying or distrustful? When questioning him, does he make you feel like YOU have an insecurity problem? Perhaps advising you to get help?
- Does the slightest argument, setback, disagreement or criticism set him off into a rage or perhaps other forms of punishment, such as him being cold, distant and using silent treatment?
- Do you walk on eggshells? Changing your personality as if you were a chameleon in hopes of keeping him happy?
- Is the sex ‘still amazing’, even though the relationship has changed considerably?
- Does he constantly break promises?
- Does the relationship feel like a Roller Coaster ride on steroids?
- Have you recently noticed him being different in the way he acts and looks at other women?
- Does your gut tell you that something is WRONG? YOU know something is wrong but you cannot find it in yourself to walk away? It’s as if you are no longer the person you once were? The ever-so-sexy, confident, happy, outgoing, aka ‘with-it’ girl, is nowhere to be found? – At least not on the surface?
- Have you tried walking away from the relationship, only to find that you’re completely obsessed with having him? One minute you ‘think’ you call the shots, and the next you are begging for mercy and convincing him that the relationship was meant to be?
Phase 3 – The Inevitable Ending – The Break Up & Being Discarded
- At this stage, do you now realize it is totally All About HIM? Everything that was elated in the beginning, the gradual loss of his attention as time went by, is now completely destroying you? It’s as if you no longer exist and all you can do is think about HIM!
- Do you now find yourself contacting him constantly, just hoping for the opportunity to rekindle his love and affection? Does he ignore your attempts?
- Have you lost control over your emotions and thoughts? Do you now feel possessed, as if you are selling yourself to the devil?
- Is he now completely disinterested lacking any form of desire for you or the relationship? As in viciously cold and totally ignoring you? He does not return calls, texts or any other form of communication.
- When he does respond, is he brutally cold and different? Treating you as if YOU never meant anything to him?
- Does he use reverse psychology? As in making statements like ‘We were not meant to be’, ‘We have nothing in common’, ‘You are too good for me’, ‘We fought all the time’, ‘Why can’t you just move on’, etc?
- Out of embarrassment, do you hide the truth from others, pretending to be in complete control?
- Have you lost sight of what makes you happy, who you are, and what you want to become. Do you even care about your future if it means he won’t be in it?
- Are you convinced that life has no meaning without them?
- Do you compare yourself and try to mold yourself into what you THINK he wants? Does it seem like everything you try, nothing seems to work?
The Narcissists Victim’s, Mates, Wives & Girlfriends
On the face of it, there is no (emotional) partner or mate, who typically “binds” with a Narcissist. They come in all shapes and sizes. The initial phases of attraction, infatuation and falling in love are pretty normal. The Narcissist puts on his best face – the other party is blinded by budding love.
Initially women have high standards and to a large degree remain extremely picky in choosing her mate however, once you have been struck by a Narcissist, his ability to persuade is incredible! He is the master of acting and his seducing ways are very hard to see through, very hard to walk away from. Again, this is why we obsess and become obsessed with having answers! This is why the break up and getting over the pain is so difficult!
What If I told You It Was Completely Possible To Walk Away From A Narcissist? That YOU Hold The Power!
Relationships With A Narcissist – Narcissistic Supply, Source of Supply & The Never Ending Roller Coaster!
Mistake #3 – Women Often Are Led To Believe The Narcissist Seeks Out The Weak
Hear this loud and clear… I firmly believe that the women who Narcissists are attracted to are far from being weak! In fact, Narcissistic men live for the chase. Always looking for bigger brighter stars! Often the women are attractive, high achievers, strong, confident and viewed by the Narcissist as having great potential. This is also known as Source of Supply.
With the Narcissist, it’s the grandiose illusion that he deserves the very best in life. The best job, the best education, the best children, the best mate and unfortunately for the victims, once the conquest is over and the Narcissist has achieved his mission, the thrill is over. The heart break, the shattered trust, knowing he cheated, not having answers, the lies, the silent treatment, the avoiding and rejection is what leaves us heart broken!
“With a Narcissist – There is no “typical victim”. Women in all walks of life, wealthy and poor, smart and dumb, tall and short, head turning and less so – all fall prey to the Narcissists abuse.” Dr. Sam Vaknin
We all love ourselves or at least we should. In fact, we all carry on some level a form of Narcissism. Narcissism in its healthy stages is real, it was typically drives us humans to take care of ourselves. To wake up, brush our teeth, groom ourselves, and essentially a driver in motivating us to be our best. Again, this is the healthy stage of Narcissism.
Loving your true self is healthy, it’s functional, it’s imperative and absolutely normal.
For the Narcissist, it goes well beyond the levels of simply wanting to be his best. In the mind of a Narcissist, he is the best and nothing short of. He will never accept anything less than the best and ladies….
HE WILL ALWAYS KEEP SEARCHING!
The Narcissist always believes that somewhere, somehow, someone is better and they are only waiting in the winds, waiting for HIM to find them..
Life After Abuse
Mistake #4 – Most Victim’s Often Believe They Were Discarded, Devalued And Rejected By The Narcissist Because They Were NOT Good Enough..
Ladies, Sam writes it best.
“Narcissists don’t take Partners, Narcissists take Prisoners”
Victim’s should realize this has nothing to do with not being good enough!
A Narcissist will simply discard and devalue his prized loved ones when he is totally convinced he has mastered the conquest of obtaining you as a loving, adoring, faithful, admiring partner.
With a Narcissist, this process is inevitable! Keep in mind, this evaluation of theirs is totally subjective and not grounded in reality at all. Suddenly, because of boredom, a disagreement, a bad day, a memory of a previous partner or a new women/new source of supply is marked by the Narcissist, he will swing from total idealization to complete devaluation.
If discarded or replaced by a new source of supply, VICTIM’S should realize this is not about being replaced with someone who is perceived as BETTER!!! Bottom-line, she is new! She is new Narcissistic Supply!
You must accept the fact that you were not an object of love to this person, but a pawn, a mere source of supply to feed their fragile ego; nothing more, but certainly nothing less. Once you understand how the Narcissist constantly change their sources of supply, you will realize their rejection, the high’s and low’s, being devalued or discarded has absolutely nothing to do with you!
Sadly, these new sources of supply will eventually experience what you are experiencing! The Narcissist will repeat this cycle in every relationship they enter. It is inevitable!!!!
Whatever you do and regardless if you purchase this book or not – NEVER COMPARE YOURSELF TO HIS NEW SOURCE, NEVER PUT IT IN YOUR MIND SHE IS BETTER! SHE IS NOT!
Remember, at this stage in the mind of a Narcissist, this is not about you! It’s All About Him!
To Take Back Your Power, To Really Bother A Narcissist, To Take Back CONTROL Over What Is Happening – Get This Out Of Your Mind!
If You Want To Really See A Narcissist In Action - Don’t Chase HIM, Don’t Validate HIM, Don’t Plead With Him, Don’t Contact HIM!
This is totally what the Narcissist expects you to do!
Mistake #5 – Women Often Settle, Women Become Fixated On The Narcissist, The Illusion and Fantasy Of The Narcissist!
Women spend entirely too much time wasting their lives while focusing on the WRONG man! Not only so, women are far too willing to give the man in her life the almighty power of controlling her happiness. With A Narcissist – You will spend the rest of your life following the shadow of a man who is damaged by his personality disorder!
You need to reach beyond the remorse, the pain, the feelings, the sadness, the disappointment! You need to kick your urge of wanting to settle for yet another sleepless round of fantasia!
Plain and simple, Narcissists get bored, Narcissists play games and Narcissists cheat, Narcissist Abuse!
With Narcissistic Men, the GAMES never end! In fact, as sick it sounds, as unfortunate as it truly is – Narcissists thrive on GAMES. The only way to ever truly win the GAME with a Narcissist is to not play at all!
In This eBook You Will Learn How To Free Yourself From A Narcissist! You Will Learn Many Steps That Will Help You Get Over A Narcissist, How To Get Over The Break Up With A Narcissistic Man & Free Yourself From A Narcissistic Relationship!
Here Are Some Of The Secrets You’ll Learn
Inside My Informative eBook
- I will show you how to regain your power back and learn how to tame the Narcissist by knowing who the Narcissist REALLY IS! Pg. 8 – The Narcissists Fragile Ego
- In my book I will cover 6-Steps that are critical to ones recovery! I will also cover many areas in helping you move forward and regain your power back from Narcissism abuse. You hold the Power! Your Power is what the Narcissist wants. Pg. 10 – The 6-Steps
- I will show you throughout my book how to understand and recognize what is happening, why it’s happening and ways to cope with the trauma and pain you are feeling! Pg. 12 – Understand IT
- When coming out of a relationship like this, the first thing we need to do is get real with ourselves about what happened in the relationship. Only by understanding the Narcissist do we realize we have suffered emotional abuse and trauma at the hands of the person we love. Pg. 13 – Charlie Sheen
- In this e-Book, I will give you the inside scoop on what’s REALLY going on inside the Narcissists mind, the Narcissists behavior, the Narcissist traits, including the things he doesn’t want you to know.. I will show you how to identify and recognize the true nature of a Narcissist. I will help you understand the complex world of a narcissist and help you understand just what it is that gives them such power and control in your reality… Pg. 16- The Narcissist In The Making
- I will also show you the dynamics of a Narcissist and why he is incapable of loving, why he continues to come back and why this relationship truly fits the modern-day roller-coaster. Pg. 18 – Narcissistic Personality Disorder
- I will address the crazy making of a Narcissist and answer questions like, Why Does the Narcissist Devalue & Discard? Pg. 19
- Why it’s crucial to understand that Narcissists Can’t Change Pg. 22
- In this book, I truly want you to GET REAL WITH WHO WE ARE DEALING WITH and accept the fact you deserve better Pg. 24
- I am often asked by victims, did he ever love me? While we want to desperately believe that somewhere in this nonsense, this is the case, it’s important to realize that Narcissists can’t love Pg. 29
- So the sex is amazing… It was always amazing, even during the low spots.. I will walk you through the what drives the sexual side of a Narcissist and cover the Madonna Whore Complex Pg. 31
- How can a smart intelligent woman LIKE ME, who’s gut tells her something isn’t quite right – she knows he is lying, she knows that she is NOT CRAZY – ‘evidence proves that’, and through his words, his infrequent acts of kindness – she falters, she believes him, she forgives? This book will identify and address how we fall for them and how we are brainwashed pg. 34
- I will also show in this section why we are drawn to the Narcissist pg. 36
- So he’s gone, he’s ignoring you, he is with someone else but….. Do they miss us? Pg. 38
- How can a man accuse a woman of being unfaithful, unappreciative, jealous, over-sensitive, demanding and all the while, she remains a ‘Stand by Her Man’ kind of woman. Someone that is faithful, admiring, honest, compassionate and in-love? Someone that has forgiven him and taken him back on countless occasions? How can a man be so manipulative convincing his partner that she is over-reacting, absurd or possibly crazy? That she is being over-sensitive, over-dramatic and thinks too much? I will address why relationships with Narcissists turn into roller-coaster rides and why the Narcissists comes back? Pg. 39
- I will help you understand that once you have been discarded or replaced by what is perceived as a new better Source of Supply, you should count your blessings! These new Sources of Supply will also feel the wrath of the Narcissist. It’s the inevitable. Give it time, it will happen. Pg. 39
- I will cover why it’s so hard for us to stay away.. Pg. 40
- But what if I just had answers or closure, they would help me move on, right? I will educate you on why the Narcissist never provides closure.. Pg. 45
- So now what? I feel obsessed… I will show you simple ways of putting that nervous energy to work! Pg. 46
- So we have all been there… Wanting to communicate, wanting to say so many things that were never said. I will cover areas of writing letters to the Narcissist – Pg. 51
- Outside of simply letting go and accepting what is happening, No contact with the Narcissist is one of the hardest things we victims face. I dedicated a FULL chapter to NO CONTACT Pg. 53 – Pg. 73
- I will help you find ways of coping with the Obsessive Thoughts – Pg. 61
- Much compared to the reasons Narcissists come back, I will try and help you understand, and make sense of the non-sense when communicating with the Narcissist – Pg. 67
- This book will help you realize why it’s so important to take back your power! Your power is what the Narcissist wants and thrives on. I will show you why the Narcissist discards his mates after the chase is over and more importantly, that you should never compare or feel threatened by his new Source of Supply. Hence, a new girlfriend, wife, job, hobby. Whatever! Pg. 77
- I show you simply ways in how you can cope with the fears you may experience, the break up and realize that FEAR is what keeps you from having POWER. Pg. 83
- If there is one thing the Narcissist sets out to do from day one is to control his victims. I will show you how to take back control Pg. 86
- Yes, this is NOT easy… But I will help you explore ways of breaking your addiction with the Narcissist. Pg. 98
- I will also show you ways of dealing with all the Anxiety you may experience and to help you realize you will and can do this.. Pg. 111
- When all of this happened to me, I knew I had to find and outlet to stream all of this energy and pain.. When I did, I wrote my first book, created a CD of songs and created www.allabouthim.com to help others who may also be suffering. I will show why its so important to take your mind off the Narcissist and use this energy on something that will benefit YOU. The Narcissist will take and take as long as you continue to allow him.. Pg. 114
- I will show you why the best medicine against the Narcissist is to focus on YOUR future, Narcissists envy anything positive and HATE to see other people rise to the top Pg. 119
- If anything drives a Narcissist crazy – it’s to think about you moving on. Whether they admit this or not!!! I will show you why YOU must focus on YOU and YOUR outlook for the future. Take Back YOUR Power… Pg. 123
- I will show why it’s key to create a new life for ourselves. We owe it to ourselves. Life is short and this is it. This is not a dress rehearsal. This is life. Live it and embrace it. We must live in the moment and be honest with ourselves at all times. We deserve real, genuine love. Believe it or not, there are people out there who are capable of it. Pg. 124
- I will show you how to embrace each day and to be grateful you have the emotional capacity to feel and love again in the future. A narcissist does not have that and will never have that. A narcissist will simply go on preying on people to get his/her needs met – over and over and over. Pg 124
- If you get anything at all from this book, I want you to realize YOU can Survive A Narcissist. I did and countless others I have coached have survived and moved on. As painful as it is, as much as you don’t want to believe me, YOU can survive this.. Pg. 125
“This is a new year, a new beginning and things will change!” Taylor Swift
I have spent the past eight years of my life helping victim’s recover from Narcissistic abuse! This book is the beginning to recovery.
The beginning of rediscovering yourself and the beginning of what I consider freeing YOURSELF from the Narcissist and ultimately TAKING YOUR POWER BACK!!
Power Is What The Narcissist Wants! To Get Over A Narcissist & Take Back YOUR Power Is What You Should Want!
YOU hold the magical solution. YOU hold the Power! This book will help you begin that process!
So what are people saying about this eBook?
Out of the thousands who have responded, Here are just a few of so many people this book has helped..
Many followers of the Narcissist never wake up. They continue to be selfless servants, unable to separate themselves psychologically from him. Many of those who do become aware of the price they are paying (giving up their own lives) make the bargain and decide that the lifestyle and perks connected with being a part of the narcissists charmed circle is worth it! They are wrong!
Skip Months Of Wondering And Questioning Yourself!!
Your ‘Secret Weapon’ To Surviving An Abusive Relationship With A Narcissist!
Surviving A Narcissist – The Path Forward
A new E-book from Lisa E. Scott (the author of top-selling e-book “All About Him.”) This book will take you much deeper into the cycles one faces in Surviving A Narcissist.
This eBook is stocked full of information that will not only change the way you look at narcissism, but also give you a step-by-step guide in understanding the mind of a Narcissist!
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